The real cost to becoming free is to believe that we are worth being given such a gift. If we work on the wisdom we are given because it has cost us an excessive amount of money, we are not doing it for a reason that will ultimately set us free. There is a story in scripture about the building of a house. It talks about the foundation you need to build on in order for the house to stand in all kinds of weather. Just yesterday there was an earthquake in Italy that has cost hundreds of lives. Yet it was lower on the Richter scale than the earth quakes in Christchurch in New Zealand that cost very few lives. Why? Maybe it was the way houses are built in New Zealand. Maybe they have a solid foundation. The story in scripture says that we need to build on a solid foundation, rock rather than sand. Continue reading The real cost.
Category: Fight The Lie
It’s Free
How many things do you get in this world that are absolutely free. And especially in this world where materialism has such a hold on most people. A delightful young man said to me this week that, when he had to pay for something, especially if the payment was quite high, then he would work much harder on the advise given to him, because he would not want to waste his money. He didn’t say that if he had to pay for it, he would think that it was worth more than if it is freely given away. But I know that many people would think like that. The more expensive something is, shows how much better it should be compared to similar things. Absolutely not so. Continue reading It’s Free
The First Original Lie
I write a lot about Adam and Eve and the Garden of Eden. It does not matter whether this story is true or not, it is the best illustration ever written about what happened to us and why we have such trouble with relationships today. I want to write how I think they would have thought once they had eaten from the tree and had their eyes open to good and evil, and experienced shame.
Shame is the feeling and carrying on through the principle of the Original Lie, the feelings have to be triggered by a thought. Adam and Eve would not have been aware of what was happening to them. They were just overwhelmed by the experience they were having of their eyes being opened. I believe their thoughts would have been something like these. Continue reading The First Original Lie
Two Kinds Of Pain
Experiencing pain is unfortunately a condition of living in this world. No-one misses out completely. However the good news is that we can do things to help ourselves when we are living with pain. I am talking about emotional pain. Physical pain is a different scenario. But dealing positively with emotional pain can help with physical pain.
There are two kinds of emotional pain; one does not lead to healing and one does. The first one is very painful and can lead to depression, and even suicide. It is the kind of pain where there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Or the going around the mountain over and over again. Or where you can describe your thoughts as can of worms. It is absolutely unproductive pain. The second is emotional pain that slowly produces growth and healing.
What is the difference between the two. Continue reading Two Kinds Of Pain
Enjoy the Journey
Like any journey we undertake in this world, whether a physical journey to a foreign country or a spiritual journey, one of the most important keys is to have a heart attitude to enjoy the journey.
I write in my first book about a trip to India I went on in my mid sixties. I had never wanted to go to India as I hate hot weather and I have a number of mild physical disabilities that make a good bed and comfortable chairs a necessity. I had a friend who went to Indonesia and only stayed 3 days because she was required to sit on the ground and she physically could not do it. And my ex husband and I had been invited to Papua/New Guinea but we were told there was no accommodation and we would have to sleep on the beach. This trip did not eventuate thankfully. The three trips were of course missionary trips. On the trip to India, conditions were every bit as bad as I had expected and yet I enjoyed the trip so much I did not want to come home.
I find in the people I talk to about the Original Lie, there are many who start the journey with attitudes that prevent them from enjoying the trip. They do not want to do the simplest exercises to get well. We do not have heart attitudes that cause us to love suffering. That is a surprise isn’t it. Fancy anyone not enjoying suffering. But unfortunately we need to have a heart attitude that allows for suffering or we aren’t going to get well. Continue reading Enjoy the Journey
Types of Emotional Pain
Following on from last month and changing myself, the next thing I learnt that helped me come to wholeness was to learn the difference between emotional pain that heals and emotional pain that keeps you in dysfunction. There are two kinds of emotional pain. One leads to healing and one doesn’t. The first one is one I sat in for twenty years. It is very painful, and can lead to depression and even suicide. It is the kind of pain where there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Deep hopelessness. Or the going around the mountain time and time again, being hurt over and over in the same way and not being able to get free of it. Or where you can describe your thoughts as a can of worms, where you cannot stop thinking negatively. It is absolutely unproductive. Continue reading Types of Emotional Pain
Changing myself
Being abused and living with a Lie controlling your every thought and action makes you very self centred. I was very self centred. I could not love my husband. I loved my children to the best of my ability, but I know I did not love them as they needed to be loved. There are many things I could say to stick up for myself and the reason I was not able to love. How do you love a husband who is severely emotionally abusive to you and who rapes you violently when he is drunk. No I did not try to stop him from this physical act. I did not fight back. I did not say no. I just let it happen. This does not mean it was not rape. I was so terrified of him and so lacking in any kind of belief in the fact that maybe I did not deserve such treatment, that I let it happen. That does not mean it was not rape. He did not have to ever hit me because I did not ever answer back or try to stop him. I lay with tears rolling down my cheeks though the whole act, but he never once saw the tears or cared. How do you keep loving when you are treated unlovingly? You can’t. Continue reading Changing myself
Continuing on
I drove down to the church that day. I still did not see how this could help me. And of course I was right. The information the lady from Alanon gave me that day was not correct. Going to church was not going to help me any more than being put into a psyche hospital was going to help me. I never tell people to go to church. But there was the most incredible help waiting for me that has changed my life. Continue reading Continuing on
The Beginning
What happened to me that I was able to come from severe dysfunction and suicidal thoughts every day to being able to live in the same severely abusive marriage and begin to find freedom.
A lady who was the leader of an Alanon group I had attended for a while was in the supermarket one day. She asked me how I was going. I told her about the psyche hospital. She said to me that if I did not get God in my life I would die. The words went into my spirit and I knew she was right. I could not continue to live as I was living. She did not show any caring for me at all. She told me where her church was and suggested I go there. She did not offer to pick me up and take me. She did not offer to sit with me or introduce me to people. In fact I heard no more from her again. She never rang to see how I was or if I had gone to her church. I learnt as I found healing that I was very unlovable in those days. I did not realise it at the time but my severe dysfunction was too much for people to handle. When you are in the amount of severe emotional pain as I was in, you cannot see anything or feel anything except the pain. You become very self centred. It takes a deep degree of being able to love to handle someone as self-centred as I was. She was not able to handle my dysfunction. There is no condemnation for her. I was nearly impossible to love. Continue reading The Beginning
The Eagle Print
In my first book, And His Bride Has Made Herself Ready, I write about a special Christmas gift given to me by God. It tells of how this special print came into my life. I reproduce the story here.
A Special Christmas Present.
My most treasured possession is a print of a sea eagle, which was a gift from God. You may ask,
“How can God give someone a Christmas present?”