I drove down to the church that day. I still did not see how this could help me. And of course I was right. The information the lady from Alanon gave me that day was not correct. Going to church was not going to help me any more than being put into a psyche hospital was going to help me. I never tell people to go to church. But there was the most incredible help waiting for me that has changed my life.
The priest that day preached on a scripture from the bible that says “For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son so all who believed on Him would not perish but would have eternal life.” As He finished speaking, he pointed out into the people gathered there and said “Even if you were the only person in the world, He would have sent His son to die for you.” As he said this, I was covered from my head down to my feet in the most incredible feeling. It was not a feeling from this world. It was indescribable. I had been a reader of spiritual books for many years looking for help from my dysfunction. I knew what I was experiencing was real.
I knew instantly that I had met this Jesus the priest was talking about. I had no religious upbringing at all. I had been to church only a few times. At my fathers funeral when I was 18. To get married. To have my three children baptised. But this day I had an experience that had impacted me so profoundly that I knew instantly that Jesus was alive and He had come and made Himself known to me.
I had never heard before that God loved me and everyone else in the world. But I was about to experience that love in an incredible way. I do not remember any more of that day. but the next morning, the feeling was back. He was back. And I began a relationship that has lasted 39 years so far, and that has taken me to a place where I am the most whole person I know. Not prefect but whole. Free. Happy. Changed completely. I have not had a “happy” life, but I have had a very fulfilled life. I would not change one thing that has happened to me before I met Him or since. I would not change places with any person anywhere. I am the most blessed person alive.
Scripture says that Jesus is the stumbling block to many being able to find what I have found. But the truth is lucifer, or satan if you like, is the one who does not want you free, and fulfilled in this world. He wanted to keep me bound up and dysfunctional. I would have succeeded in taking my own life sooner rather than later. The lady from Alanon was right about one thing. I would die if something did not happen for me. It wasn’t church that happened. It was an intimate relationship with Jesus. A relationship that He wants to have with each and every one of you also. I hope you will keep reading. I was absolutely desperate so I accepted Him so easily. I hope you have not had to become as desperate as I was. He is real. He is the only real answer for this world and for every person in it.